What do you do when you have lots of money to waste? Why, you spend it on a $6,650 toilet to be exact! That’s the price tag for the Kohler Numi Comfort toilet seat, which includes quite an extensive list of advanced features and options that allow you to have some fun while you’re dropping a deuce.
To put this thing in perspective, there’s a USB port on the back of the toilet so that authorized service technicians can update the firmware for the toilet. Yes, you heard me correctly, this thing has firmware.
Just take a look at that photo above, the thing even looks like a futuristic space commode! The light on the back is designed with an ambient light engine that can display up to seven different colors. If you want, you can even have the Numi cycle through all the colors almost like a display mode, or you can set it to display a different color for each day of the week. Hopefully they don’t have the color brown included in that cycle for obvious reasons.
The Kohler Numi is actually an extension of a previous model, called the Kohler C3. Both models are extremely luxurious “thrones” that include a wide array of features.
They include a bidet, heated dryer, heated seat, foot warmers, user profiles (to customize settings individually) and an integrated music player. Holy hell! Heated seats and foot warmers, you are outside your mind Kohler! Still, I cannot lie that would be pretty awesome. I hate plunking down on the toilet with my bare bottom because the seat always seems to be freezing.
Both models even have a wireless remote that can control all the crazy features. Even the toilet lid and seat can be opened and closed by remote. You can even flush using the remote, so you never have to worry about getting all those nasty poo germs on your hands. Well, you’d still contract them from wiping, but that integrated bidet certainly helps!
Of course, the Numi also includes several new features that justify the upgrade. The biggest feature is an integrated Bluetooth receiver that allows you to stream music directly from a smartphone or tablet to your toilet. There’s also an SD expansion slot so you can organize custom playlists or personalized greetings for your ultimate throne. Think Siri, only it’s your commode greeting you as a Rock God and not your phone.
There’s also a battery backup that keeps the toilet working even during a power outage. The battery supports up to 100 flushes, which is incredibly useful especially if you live up north where the power is always going out.
Both of these toilets are utterly ridiculous, but that doesn’t change the fact that I want one. Maybe I can send out to Kohler and request a review unit. What do you think? Let us know in the comments  below!